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Posts Tagged ‘Donde Esta Elisa’

Wow, game over, they found Elisa

June 2, 2010 Leave a comment

That was…fast.

So…Commissionario Rivas is a suspended cop…who still gets to keep his service weapon apparently, and has no problem running through the woods WITH HIS WEAPON DRAWN. I’ve known a few cops in my time. Apparently, they have to do an assload of paperwork anytime they even unholster their weapon, much less fire it. Not like Rivas is going to go tell Miss Internal Affairs he had his weapon drawn, but running around with your weapon drawn is just not something cops do in real life. C’mon Telemundo. We expect better from you.

Now we have a rather disturbing Huggies commercial trying to make diapers look stylish. Two things:
1. You can’t be stylish when you’re fourteen months old
2. Walking around town with a load in your pants isn’t a good look for anyone.

Rivas is looking a little touchy-feely with Elisa here. I can kinda forgive that on her part, since she apparently likes older dudes, including her uncle. Cristobal finds Elisa, and his first call isn’t to, say, EMS? No, it’s to mom. Jeeze, Rivas, we don’t even know if she’s going to survive until the commercial break.

Aaaand the whole family’s happy. Except, of course, her kidnapper. He seems a little miffed. Cecilia’s got sort of a Lady Macbeth thing going on at this point, not wanting her husband to, you know, tell the cops he kidnapped his niece after sleeping with her. I can understand how that would ruin her plans for the Summer Cotillion.

Santiago, you’re dad’s gay. You’ll need to get over that. His name is Jose Angel, for chrissake. How did you NOT know he was gay?

Mama Altamira goes batshit in the hospital, screaming her head off in Spanish. Now Rivas strides in all heroic like with Elisa in his arms. Now slow motion shots. Now commercial breaks.

And now…hot women in skimpy clothing! I dunno what this show’s selling, but I’m buying. Ah. A commercial for El Clon. I’ll take two. Surreal commercials for breath-freshening gum. I approve.

Ever get the feeling Telemundo’s local news really only has the one girl as a field reporter? I’m pretty sure she’s the entire news team.

And we’re back. I’m still kinda thinking about that gum commercial though. I coud really go for some gum right now.

Cecilia and Bruno are in hot pursuit on the way to the hospital. I get the feeling Cecilia’s going to try to kill Elisa to cover up the whole her husband kidnapping her thing. She’s got the Cotillion to think about, after all.

Elisa’s in surgery now. Hopefully, to remove her vocal chords.

Ah Viviana. Your mouth is painfully too wide. And you’re kinda a pain in the ass. And you’re husband’s gay. His boyfriend’s a lot hotter than you. Deal with it.

Wow, Fiscal’s saying nice things about Rivas.

Senor Altamira isn’t one for underacting. Just keep shouting, dude. The louder you are, the more we understand you’re excited.

And that’s it for another episode of Donde Esta Elisa. Hey, if they leave her in a coma, they could drag this on for another ten or twelve years.

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Enough with the voiceovers

May 27, 2010 Leave a comment

You’re remembering stuff from earlier this episode. Literally, that shit just happened. MOVE ALONG.

Loving the Grey’s Anatomy Rip Off

May 27, 2010 Leave a comment

A Corazon Abierto is the latino, non-union equivalent of Grey’s Anatomy, even down to the cheezy pun in the title: Get it? These surgeons are doing “open heart” surgery, but the hearts are also open…to love!

With writing that stupid, I must check it out.

It ain’t a telenovela til someone gets bitchslapped

May 27, 2010 Leave a comment

Huston, we have liftoff.

The stakes should really be much higher

May 27, 2010 Leave a comment

If the music is gonna be this dramatic. That’s like John Cusack trying to escape armageddon music.

Melodramatic music and whiny pubescents

May 27, 2010 Leave a comment

Must be time for Donde Esta Elisa?

Aaaand we’re out.

May 26, 2010 Leave a comment

How many more days until el ultimo capitulo?